Do you find yourself in a bad mood Tuesday mornings when the defense you selected in the 10th round, the Seattle Seahawks, is out-scored by 25 points by a defense like, say, the Green Bay Packers, that went undrafted? You might want to hitch a ride on the no-more-defense-and-special-teams-in-fantasy-football bandwagon.

Earlier this week on his SiriusXM Fantasy Sports Radio program, Jeff Mans went off about the inclusion of the position in standard fantasy football leagues. You can read the monologue in its entirety, or have a listen below.

Defense and special teams in fantasy football are a complete joke. Really, just stupid. I hate ’em. I know I’ve mentioned this before … I hate them so much. They’re the worst ever. Everybody handicaps them the same way. “OK, I’m gonna say that I’m gonna play the defense against the worst quarterback or the worst offense.” OK, so, then why did you choose the Green Bay Packers? They were the No. 1 defense this week. Because the Eagles are the worst offense? No they’re not. Why did you choose Tampa Bay? They were the worst defense in the league coming into this week. They were No. 2. The 49ers, Chargers, Cardinals, OK, they’re decent defenses. Chicago Bears, seventh-best defense this week — again, 30th in the league in total defense going into this week. I mean, are you kidding? Remember the Indianapolis Colts? They were horrific this week. The Eagles were the top scoring fantasy defense, by the way, in fantasy football, and they had negative-6 points … They’re a joke. There is no way to handicap them properly. There’s one trick that everybody uses. It’s the same. You can’t tell what 11 guys are gonna do. And then, you don’t have to choose 11, you have to choose 22, because what are special teams gonna do? They’re gonna return a kick? Or they’re gonna get a kick returned against them? Which counts against your defense, which doesn’t make any goddamn sense. Defense and special teams, can we as a society stop? Can we just stop? Listen, there were a lot of things our forefathers did before us that were awesome, and we thank them, and we celebrate them at Thanksgiving, and all that stuff, all right. But there were some things that were just stupid, and some things need to evolve. And this is No. 1 in fantasy world. This is No. 1. We cannot go another year with this. It is just so awful. Awful. As a civilization, as a society, as an industry, we need to stop it.

Or, in two words:

“Defense sucks.”

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